PsychoDirk and the Burglar.

by Dave Sykes.

My only experience of a burglary, so far, was some years ago when I rented a room. There were five rooms in the house, we shared a kitchen, a bathroom and common area.

There was only two of us on the lower floor. My room was one half of what originally was a larger room that had been cheaply divided to make two rooms. In the other half was the strangest of guys. His name was Dirk, but I always thought of him as PsychoDirk.

I don't think that anyone ever saw him smile and his conversation was minimal, to say the least, except when he was talking to himself. He always made me feel he was accusing me of something with the way he stared, very piercing.

The dividing wall between our two rooms was paper thin, that's how I knew that he talked to himself. Very often it would be real dark, ranting stuff. Sometimes I make a little noise to let him know I was in my room, made no difference he'd keep ranting.

About the burglary. I came home one evening and there was quite a fuss in progress, seems PsychoDirk's room had been broken into. The house had a pretty good lock on the front door but the locks on the rooms were cheap things. Somehow someone had gotten in without busting the main lock and kicked the door of PsychoDirk's room, just his room.

This made me uncomfortable, very uncomfortable. The thought that it could have been my room the burglar picked was bad enough, but I was also uncomfortable with the thought that PsychoDirk would come to the conclusion that one of his house mates was the culprit, seeing that there was no sign of how the burglar got in the house.

Mr Psycho-Pants did not make much of a fuss. He said that a leather coat and a watch was missing, he did not want the police or the landlord informed. He was very clear about that, none of us argued with him. He screwed the lock back on the door and was in his room for the rest of the night.

Just over a week later, one of the other guys who was home sick from his job, heard someone enter the house by the main door. This was followed by an almighty bang. He came downstairs to find a stranger kicking at PsychoDirk's door. He quickly about faced and locked himself in his room and used his cell to call the police. Of course the burglar high tailed it out of there PDQ. The police did get him tho, about an hour later.

The thief was found to have a key for the front door, how he got that never did come to light as far as I know. What was so attractive in PsychoDirk's room? I worried myself thinking about it!